Hey June

Hey June, please be nice to me.

I've been away from here almost 6 months. Life was tougher than I expected. After the broke up, everything has changed differently in my life. It never be the same like it used to be. The pain was unbearable but I know I need to let him go. Since then, I started to reject people indirectly.

Let's start with May. I joined Kasih Hospice as volunteer and I attended the basic training as well. Surprisingly, I got my first permanent job. It was so random since it took less than a week for them to process my resume. The interview was so terrified. It took few hours to finish it. First week, I felt so upset and down with everything. Uneasy feeling. Oh well, it has been a month plus and I'm still surviving. *finger crossed*

It was random weekend on May. I guess it was first week of weekend, mother day where I went to Kasih Hospice at Pj area. With the app, I met him. It was so randomly and happening. He the one who started to message me. I replied nicely. Exchanged number. We were chatting until he want to meet me. I never expect anything. Maybe we could be friend because I know myself cannot bear with another pain anymore. Trying not to be overly attached.

He came to fetch me at somewhere near Sentul. He went to Coffee Coffee at Bangsar. I am observer, shy and less talkative. He was so talkative and everything were about him on that day. He told me about his life. Something was so special about him. His eyes were magnetic and his smile was so charming and it make me felt so warm.

 He sent me back to nearest LRT station. Surprisingly, he asked for a date and I replied yes with no hesitation.

English is not my first language. I am not that kind of person who know how to express my feelings. So I never tell him about how's the first day we wet was like. I was intrigued. His magnetic eyes and his smile is really killing me slowly inside. He is charming, smart, sporty. His gesture, body language and know the ways to get close to me.

I feel astonishingly happy from the inside out. By happy,I meant I am constantly smiling and always feeling joy in my heart.  I can hardly recall the last time I incessantly feeling shy and awkward and causing hyperventilation by just talking to a person.

We kept in touch and began to go on date regularly. But, he always busy and sometimes, I really hope he can make his time.

-Love always-